Meeting the Maker, Almost

I almost met the maker today!
I was racing home...... in the zone, going warp speed, when all of a sudden as I am nearly across one of the cross walks, I look up and wham! There is a car, right there,
going full throttle and turning full speed.
Well , I let out a scream of the greatest proportions.......
"AHHHHHH! OH MY GOD I'M GONNA DIE! WHAT THE FUCK???!!!"
Thank god that bacon eating bitch, saw me at the last minute! She had come with-in 3 inches of my sweet precious life!(and new sick bike)
I'm sure that if I had not screamed my blood curdling scream she would have takin me out.....
In one big nasty squish.


Aside from all of this, my new sick ride is freaking awesome! It peddles like melted butter, and shifts like a dream! (most of the time, gotta get a tune up)


On this most glorious sunny day, all I have thought about is riding my bike!
I can finally see myself as a full time bike rider. (except in the winter! ........Maybe?)
I have to get my MINI ME'S up, able and fit for the riding.


I, like SIDEKICK, am wondering if we will be sitting on a park bench drinking the last of an Old E 40 waiting for spring. If you see us, please don't bother stopping us.
Salty beer is not as bad as it seems, and our tears will dry by the spring melt.


I would like to share now, some of the terms that SIDEKICK and I have come up with along the ride...........


PB= Pussy Banger: that is when you hit a bump going really fast, and the bike jars up and hits you....... Well, you know where.

BG= Bum Gum: when your gum becomes too hard to chew, and you must dispose of it, somewhere the bums can find it, and chew it later.

DR= Drunk Riding: I do not need to explain this. It has been talked about often in our other posts!

ATLR= At Least There're Riding: fat people we really like to see riding their bikes.

BD= Bum Drinking: yeah, you guessed it! The last swig of a forty.

BF= Bum Food: any and all food, found on the trail. This is to also include hot dogs that are hours old, and cooked in the sun. (they looked tasty til someone ran them over! poor bums!)

BS= Bum Sex: the nasty stinky fish smell that eminated from the bushes while we were passing 'known' bum bushes. (THIS is just wrong! AND IT STINKS!!! take note bums! Wash yer shit iffen' yer gonna get it on!)

BB= Bum Bushes: where the bums sleep....... (and have nasty, stinky bum sex.)

BE=Bacon Eaters: any and all people that dare to run us over in cross walks! We are convinced they are just trying to hurry up and get that next piece of bacon.

Well, that is a good start for now.
Let us know if YOU can think of anything else for us.