Ok. It's March already. I'm patiently waiting for the days to become warmer. I am seeing signs of spring though. Like when I leave the gym @ the ass crack of dawn it's actually light out. Or, when I sleep in til 8:30am on the weekends, it's full on bright out day by then. Also, when we walk everyday @ lunch (even though it's been like 20 the last week) I can't help but see tell tale signs of spring.
Now, GORRAM IT if only the fricken weather would catch up!
On a whole other subject, I'd like to chat about gas.........
Not the kind that goes into your lawn mower or snow machine, or even your car. The kind that blows outta yer anus. The kind that stinks to high heaven, or if your DANGER GIRL it just trumpets out your ass like a fog horn never to be heard from again or even smelled. You see, the reason for this diatribe is due to the fact that, (beyond DANGER GIRL just letting one loose in the other office that got me to thinking about it in the first place) I eat copious amounts of garlic. I'm very serious. You see, I eat, let's say, possibly 40-100 cloves of fresh/cut/sliced/cooked/mashed/etc etc... garlic a week...
Of course given my mood and how much I really cook.
But,
I'm trying really hard to figure a use for all this extra gas that emanates from my bung hole due to the shit ton of garlic I consume.
I mean, could this be the solution to our national crises? Could my ass air solve our national deficit? Would my flatulence save all of the failing car dealerships?Maybe I should call up Obama and offer my 'wind service' to help with our energy crises, Lord knows I could use some help with my gas bill.
Or, maybe I'm contributing to that hole in the "ozone" everyone keeps talkin about.
Geeze.....
This is quite the conundrum.
I'm going to have to think a bit more and get back to you.
In the mean time, you'd best cover your noses.
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